Want the truth? I’m not sure how I feel about my biological father. He seems wishy washy, disorganized, unmotivated, and indecisive. On the other hand, he’s kind, caring, and a bit funny. He’s not an effective communicator. Wait, perhaps it’s better to say he doesn’t communicate with me in a way in which I understand. I’m just not sure I can trust him yet. I don’t think he wants to hear the truth about how I feel about him either. I’m angry that he never tried to contact me when I was younger. I’m upset that he thinks things will just be happily ever after, without even really getting to know me. Uggghhh…what a head ache. I hope things get better. I told him some of the things I posted below this post, and he said I hurt his feelings. What I want to know is he upset that he hurt me? Or, is he upset that I told him the truth and didn’t just pretend everything was wonderful during our visit? If anybody should have the right to be hurt, ahem, that would be me.
I know without a doubt I will never be as important to him as his other daughter and his wife. How do you reconcile that? I guess I can be thankful that my parents put me first, are always there to support me, and would go to the end of the world for me. Then, why is this so damn frustrating?