Opinions

Why is it that everybody has an opinion on something that really is none of their damn business? I’m ready to pull out every hair on my head. I’m babysitting everybody and their baggage. Brother feels blindsided, and has no clue why I would want to do this. He’s fiercly loyal to long time dad. (Ummm…me too.) Mom is frustrated and running around like a chicken with her head cut off. She’s all kinds of twisty on the inside, but trying to be motherly and supportive. (I wish I could make this easier for her.) Long time dad is insecure and scared. Bio dad is excited and thrilled. Bio grandparents are over the moon. Bio sister is the most excited. (And I find that touching.) I’ve goteen calls from family members all of which are trying to be supportive, but for the life of them can’t figure out why I would do this to myself and family. (How the hell do I explain this?) My long time grandma has been my best ally other than hubby. Long time grandma is actually long time dad’s mother. Who would have guessed she would be the most supportive one in the family?!

Please tell me everybody chills out soon!

I have booked a week to see bio dad with mom in March. I had no way to not have her go. She’s been with me through everything else, and she wants to go. So, I guess I want her there in some ways. Perhaps this will help her heal.

I would kill for some good sleep!

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Published in: on February 5, 2007 at 8:41 pm  Comments (6)  

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6 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Hopefully soon it will all settle down. Soon they will see that you’re not doing this *to* anybody, but for yourself. That it’s not meant to hurt long=time dad. Hopefully soon this reunion will only allow your family to grow, and your whole long-time family will soon realize it is not something you’re doing for spite. I think they’ll probably settle down a bit once the initial excitement of it all passes.

  2. I hope I am more understanding when my adopted children beging looking for their bio parents. It must be hard trying to convince them that you don’t love one dad more than the other.

    I can’t imagine what this is like for you, but I hope things settle down soon and you can now enjoy spending time with both your families.

  3. I wanted to resolve this before I had children. Especially adopted children. It would be ten times more difficult to deal with if I had little ones demanding attention too. I’m glad I chose now.

  4. It’s a tough spot to be in. Everyone’s dealing with confusion and trying to sort out their feelings. I hope that they can soon see that it’s nothing you’re doing “to” them.

  5. I have written about this a thousand times. It doesn’t get ANY easier to understand. How people can be so clueless is really beyond me. I’m sorry you are not loved and supported (by those who SHOULD be supporting you) at a time you could use it the most. Shame on them all for being so entirely selfish.

  6. I really hope your family can look beyond what this means for them and see that what is most important is what it means to you. I have no firsthand experience with this situations, but as a potential adoptive parent, I think about how these relationships will happen all the time. My naive guess is that it’s very complex and probably really difficult. But it needs to be done.

    I hope that you and your mom have a great trip. I really hope your family can find it in themselves to support you now.


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